Actual message copied directly from an online dating site from a 30 year old woman claiming intelligence, spelling errors and all.
"ok doll. u r so right i am not intelligant..... u r so right darling lol....luv id run circles round u"
I was excited to let my friends meet the guy I had been seeing so I made plans for us all to meet at a restaurant. Dinner went great and my friends seemed to like him. He got up to go to the bathroom and was gone for awhile. Our waiter, who we knew from being semi-regulars, came up and told me my date had just asked out his co-worker. Scumbag!
I arrived for drinks a little early so I was sitting at the bar with my white wine. When my date arrived he ordered a glass of milk.
I went on a blind date, set up by his mom. We went to a great Mexican place, but the conversation wasn't very good - mostly because my date had two forks, so he could use BOTH hands to get food into his mouth. Apparently one fork didn't work fast enough.
I asked this chick out and after 2-3 days we were sitting at her house, in the living room, watching her little brother play his X-Box 360. I made one smart-ass comment to her brother, who is 12, and the next day she said it wasn't working out.
My date and I approached the restaurant. I stood in front of the door waiting for him to open it, but he didn't move. I stood there for about 20 seconds...then I awkwardly said "I guess I forgot how to open a door." I opened it and he went in first.
I woke up in bed next to my date with what I thought was a cold sweat. It turns out that you are never too old to pee the bed. I slept in my date's pee.
On our 1st date she mentioned that she liked Swedish Fish candy. Things went well that night (she invited me back to her place). Second date I decided to bring her a pack of Swedish Fish. She seemed really happy to see me when she walked into the restaurant, but when I handed her the candy she told me that I was moving too fast and she left.