I laughed so hard at my date's joke that I peed in my pants- literally.
I was out to dinner with a guy (he made the reservation). Things were going well and I was enjoying myself. At the end of the meal the waiter put the bill down in front of my date. After a few minutes went by, he started slowly pushing it towards me with his elbow. It was so awkward, I took out my wallet and paid. He didn't even offer to split it!
My best friend's date looked at her and said, "That's a great dress! It really shows off your tits.". Some guys are so classy...
I went out on a date with a guy. We really hit it off. The next day, one of his friends asked me out. I said no, because I had just gone out on a date with his friend. He said, "Oh, I know. We have a bet to see who can sleep with you first."
I went over to this girl's place after we went out one night. We started fooling around on the couch and wound up in her bed. When I woke up the next morning my t-shirt had a big wet spot on it and smelled kind of funky. Turns out her cat was pissed that I had taken his place in the bed so he peed on me.
We were having a good conversation when the waiter brought out our appetizers. The nachos had meat on top, which my vegetarian date had specifically ordered without. Rather than politely asking for a new order with no meat, she started yelling/cursing at the guy. She called him a retard and a murderer. I was never more embarrassed in my life.
My date showed up wearing a t-shirt that had a rooster printed across the front and it said "BIG" in huge letters underneath it. About fifteen minutes into our date I realized what it meant.
I went out with one guy for three months. Then he tells me that he has six kids with four different mamas.
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